Dads who raise boys who respect Everyone has the right. Show by your actions and reactions that both men and women have rights, and ane their own people At HFVIN we believe that the best way to keep children safe from family violence is to prevent violence occumg inYour choice. Show that they can say no to any kind of touching. Be clear it is their choice about who they hug or kiss the first place. This happens when we break the cycle, and create healthy safe homes where parents You decide. Give them options that have safe consequences, and respect their decisions lwhether together or not) demonstrate respect for each other, Children learn best by following what they see inHonesty poligy. Arswer tutfully to their questions about sexuaility and relationships and give accurate information their own environment All parents have a role to play in this, but as we head towards White Ribbon Day, encouraging men to take a stand against violence against women, we'll be looking at the role dads play in our whanau Last week we looked at the role Dads play with our tiniest tamariki. This week the toolkit has advice on how dads land other male role model) can positively infliuence primary aged children Kids 5-10 years old tyou don't know the answer help them look it up Room to talk. Ensure there is space for them to ask questions and have many short conversations. Talk about thoughts and feelings, nights and wrongs in relationships, not just about how all the bits work Family values. It's good to be clear about your own values and what you expect from them, but give tham space to work things out for themselestoo Ask, What do you think should happen?" or "Iif you could make it better what would you do? Reality check.It's just the world we live in-your child will see pornography, by mistake or because they're curious Try not to overreact. Instead take the opportunity to talk about how pom is unrealstic, and that it can be hurtful Still law u. Keep showing and telling them you love them, even though you might not like how they're acting No boxes. Keep on encounaging your son to be himself, and not just what a boy is meant to be. Help him manage messages to be in the man box,especially the ones about boys being more important than girts, Keep checking out your own expectations of him How do you feel? Help your kids identify their emotions and manage them in healthy ways-expressing big feelings is not easy. For sons, it's things lke fear and sadness, and for daughters, it might be hander to What do you reckon? Encourage them to be assertive, but also to negotiate and compromise so that everyone wins Working it out. Help them understand why things happen, how to work out a good resolution, and how to weigh s consequences more important then gifs. Keep checkng out yourBe you. Give them ways to help manage peer pressure Develop your son's empathy, Ask thingslke"How would you feel that happened to you?" or "How do you think that feels when you treat them lke that Develop your daughter's confidence. Help her talk about what she wants by saying, "Tell me what you want to happen. or How coud express anger Behave respectfully, Ask them what respect actually means and how they know if theyrebeing respecful or not, Talk about you eplih what you want to others? what respect means when texting, on Snapchat or Facebook Yousme. Show that men and women are equally vakable. Nice one. Keep reinfoncing any behaviour tha shows respect for others VIOLENCE FREE Toolbox for Dads www.whiteribbon.org.nz